I realize that the day of Thanksgiving has come and gone for all of us, but I have been thinking about that day a lot since then. I sit back and reflect on many different things.
We spent the day gathering with my Mom's extended family, the Verhulst relation. My Aunt Shirley was in charge of the festivities and because they are all getting older and the family is rather large we have been, for many years already, going out to eat instead of making somebody slave over a stove and deal with dishes and too much cleaning up later. And I don't know about you but I'm always up for an old fashion or two when having my Thanksgiving meal so I looked forward to it and afterwards we were all invited to her house to bullshit and catch up.
This year at Thanksgiving however, there was a bit of a dark cloud hanging over us, or at least I couldn't stop thinking about it. One of my cousins, who is quite a few years older than me, but none the less has made an influence on me over the years whether she knows it or not, had recently been diagnosed with Lou Gehrigs disease and anybody who is familiar with this disease knows prognosis is never very good. It breaks my heart really and it angers me all at the same time. One of those situations once again in life where I question God's reasoning and have to analyze why?
My cousin Donna is by far one of the kindest and most sincere people I have ever known in my life! Seriously, I don't think there is a mean bone in her body. She has focused her life on family as long as I know her...family and FAITH..and this is how she is repaid? Where is the sense in that?
I've heard the saying many times already in life "God won't give you more than you can handle" but I can't even begin to comprehend how you handle this. And I am upset with myself because our time went so fast on Thanksgiving and between watching Luke and making sure he was behaving at the restaurant and eating and the idea that I seriously didn't realize she wasn't going to be at my Aunt Shirley's afterwards, I didn't make a point of going over to talk to her and let her know how I felt and how much she has influenced me and how I've always thought she was such a wonderful person, mother, wife, daughter, daughter-in-law, etc.
Oh I still will, I made a vow that I will. I'm not sure what I will say, but I need to let her know how much I care about her and all of them. A card is going out in the mail tomorrow. I will likely make a meal to bring over. I have to do something to show I care or it will kill me. I know how little things can go a long way in life.
Man life sure does work in mysterious and crappy ways. It was hard to be thankful and to be positive and I'm a positive person most of the time.
Once again God has thrown a curveball to help remind me to appreciate all of the little things, the things way too many people take for granted.
I will always be thankful for my family, my friends, a gorgeous sunrise in the morning, a good song on the radio, clothes on my children's back, a roof over my head, a good cup of coffee, a messy house full of toys, a dog who begs for affection and a faith in the Lord to make sense of it all...and a lot more.
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