Saturday, July 9, 2011

Tired & Confused

Okay, so my post today isn't going to have a ton of pictures and it likely won't be nearly as inspirational as some maybe have been in the past.  I never promised to put up a front and pretend that life is all peachy keen at all times.  I think anybody would agree that isn't at all possible as life just simply doesn't work that way.

Even I, Miss Optimistic, have days or weeks once in a while where I feel more tired than others and perhaps even a bit pissed off about certain things, and the last few days of this week was one of those.  By the time Friday afternoon rolled around I couldn't wait for my weekend to start and be able to relax (even if that meant cleaning and doing laundry) and just spending time with my hubby and kiddos and appreciate everything that really matters to me the most and I refuse to lose sight of them and let the shitty people I come across in my weekly routine ruin my outlook on my family.

If there is anything I have learned over the course of this week, and well the last few years actually, is people can be real assholes, pardon my French.  And society as a whole has become one horribly greedy, "me, me, me" type of bunch.  I see it every day when watching the news, I witnessed it when in Las Vegas, and I deal with it every work day.  Most people nowadays when it comes right down to it are only looking out for themselves and they don't give a flying f&%# who they have to step on or hurt to get what they want.  Whatever they need to do to satisfy their "needs" or "wants", for that hour anyway, they will do.

I think of the Casey Anthony trial.  That has the word greed written all over it.  I don't care what the verdict ended up being, I think she was guilty as all hell.  And the sole reason she did what she did from what anybody can see was to make her life easier.  It had nothing to do with what that beautiful little girl wanted.  She didn't have a choice.

You see it on the news all the time with the wonderful politicians we have in our country who consistantly lie and cheat about a variety of things, usually of sexual nature.  Sports figures who have affairs on their wives or Hollywood starlets doing the same thing, and all because they only care about themselves and not at all how their actions affect their children, their spouse or anybody else.

Okay I'm rambling, but I do know that lately this type of behavior and attitude that I have to face and deal with too much lately is wearing me down.  It's wearing me down because I'm not that kind of person and it angers me so much when I have to deal with it and I am the one being stepped on. 

I'm confused, the anger I have had the last while has really got me thinking.  Thinking some changes may need to be made in the future.  I have been praying to God that he leads me in the right path and I trust him.  He has got to see my frustration and he has to know I'm a caring person that is so sick of lies and being bullied by people who have no appreciation whatsoever of the person I am and the views I have.

I could go on and on as just writing this is making my blood boil again.  But you know what?  I'm not going to let this situation ruin the rest of my weekend and I'm sure as hell not going to forget that I do know a ton of great people in this world who aren't dickheads, and who DO care about people's feelings and who wouldn't step on me just to make themselves feel better about themselves and whatever it is that causes them to have the low self esteem they obviously have.  I always say that people who have to act like they are in a position of power or treat people like shit to make themselves feel better have to do it for a lack of something in their own lives.  I guess I'm not lacking anything then because I would feel horrible treating people the way some people I know do!

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